Birth Story: An unmedicated, faith-filled, hospital birth

The following is the pregnancy and birth story of a dear client of mine. I always encourage my clients to seek out positive and empowered birth stories as they prepare for birth. This mama prepared so prayerfully and intentionally in pregnancy and had a faith-filled, unmedicated, hospital birth. I am very happy to share her story with you now!

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Melissa's Story

Pregnancy came as a total surprise, as my husband and I had only been married for 2 months and were still adjusting to married life. But of course, God always has plans of his own. The first trimester was brutal. I learned quickly that morning sickness is not just in the morning! Once I got through that first trimester, I started thinking about planning for birth. I considered doing an unmedicated birth in the hospital, but I wasn’t sold. I knew pretty much nothing about birth. So when I learned about a doula, I knew that’s exactly what I needed. Thankfully, God guided us to Pam. I’m so happy we started working with her towards the early months of my pregnancy (I think we started working with Pam when I was only 3.5 months pregnant)—especially because things took an interesting turn at my 20-week anatomy scan appointment. The more I started researching the birth process, the more excited I was about trying for an unmedicated birth. But after my anatomy scan, I was told that I had a complete placenta previa. Basically, my placenta was completely covering my cervix, which would make vaginal birth dangerous and likely impossible. My doctor put me on pelvic rest and told me that if it did not resolve on its own then I would most likely need an early scheduled c-section to deliver the baby safely. I was devastated, mourning the loss of the awesome birth I hoped to have. Thankfully, I spoke to Pam and she encouraged me to pray, hope it would resolve on its own, and ultimately trust in God. During these weeks, I wrestled a lot with God in my prayers. And I think God used it to show me how I still struggled to trust in God completely, especially in times of uncertainty. I wanted what I wanted and struggled to truly invite God into my pregnancy and birth story. When I truly surrendered to God’s plan, my heart was happy to accept whatever God led me to. Now that I think about it, I can see that our God-given name for our son, Josiah, was no coincidence. The name Josiah means “God supports and heals.” Maybe I was praying for God to heal my placenta previa. But in reality, God was working to heal my mistrusting heart.  

When I was close to 7 months pregnant, I tripped and fell on my butt. That fall brought me to the emergency room for a sprained ankle. Since I had a placenta previa diagnosis, I was put in a high-risk category. So when I came to the hospital because of a fall, I was taken to the labor and delivery unit for some tests. My husband and I lightheartedly joked that God would use that fall to move my placenta out of the way. Amazingly, by the grace of God (and probably not my fall), a couple weeks later I learned that my complete placenta previa resolved and I was cleared for a vaginal birth! Indeed, God has a funny way of working. 

In preparing for birth, several things helped me. Of course, my doula Pam and all of her wisdom, resources, and encouragement. I also started listening to the Christian Hypnobirthing app, which I highly recommend. The different tracks helped me to prepare my mindset for birth, even welcoming all of the unexpected and allowing God to guide the process. I did a couple of the classic childbirth classes, which were somewhat helpful. But I found it most helpful to do my own research. I also did a lot of stretches and light exercises to prepare my body physically. Together with Pam, I also developed a birth plan. Of course, things don’t always go as planned. But it was helpful to get everything on paper so that my whole team was ready to support me in the hospital when I might not have been able to advocate for myself.  

My due date was July 31st, and doctors told me that first-time moms usually go past their due dates. But God already told me that I would have my son Josiah in the month of July. And, sure enough, on July 26th, the marvelous labor-inth Pam had been sharing about began! I was at our Friday evening church meeting, and I started to feel some cramps. I wrote them off as probably Braxton-Hicks contractions, as they were not quite consistent. I went to bed around 10pm but woke up again around midnight because the cramps were finally getting uncomfortable. My husband was at work and wouldn’t come home until around 3am. So I just started to keep track of the contractions in an app on my phone. It seemed like they were becoming more regular, so I notified my village (including Pam). Per Pam’s suggestion, I tried to rest throughout early labor so I could preserve my energy. That proved to be very difficult, as contractions were getting stronger and closer together. I think around 1:30am, contractions were lasting for 1 minute and were happening every 8-10 minutes. But I was determined to stay at home as long as possible, until the contractions really became unbearable. My husband came home at 3am, and I told him to sleep so he could have the energy to step in when things got really hard. I set up my “labor shop” in the living room—including dim lighting, an essential oil diffuser, my Christian Hypnobirthing app (mainly just the instrumental music track), a birthing ball, coconut water, birth comb, and a pillow mountain to lean up against so I could rest between contractions.

When I think about it, it’s interesting that labor tends to start in the early hours of the morning when most people are asleep. It almost feels like God’s design so we can enjoy this beautiful, quiet time with Him alone. Anyway, at around 3am I decided to take a warm bath in the dark bathroom with a lavender candle. The warm bath helped so much with contractions. I labored in there for over an hour. After that, I continued to bounce and roll around on my birth ball, tried to rest on the couch, and changed positions frequently. At around 7am, I went outside for a walk and called a close friend. It helped take my mind off the discomfort for a little while. Things seemed to stall a little bit, as contractions were stuck at around 6 minutes apart. My husband woke up and began helping me with counter-pressure, which helped a lot. At 12pm, I called Pam, and she listened to me while I had a contraction. She said it seemed like I was still in early labor, so I continued to labor at home. I really did not want to go to the hospital early and risk being turned away. Finally, around 2:30pm, contractions became so strong that I had to use the low-moaning techniques that I learned about. I had previously been so embarrassed at the thought of making such noises. But when I was in pain and labor-focused, all of that went out the window. 

Joking in between contractions en route to the hospital

At 2:45, we headed to the hospital with my husband, mom, and stepdad while Pam was on her way. After going through triage, I was delighted to learn that I was already 7cm dilated. I think I cried in that moment. Not because of pain, but because I realized that I did it! With God’s help, I was able to go this far. And it gave me the confidence to keep going. Actually, throughout the whole labor process, I was both surprised and impressed with my body. I admit that I had some doubts about my ability to go through this whole thing without any medication. But each contraction felt like a little victory. That one-contraction-at-a-time mindset really did help me. The hospital room was actually pretty spacious, and the staff was really welcoming of my birth plan and birth team. I had my Christian hypnobirthing tracks playing, along with my essential oil diffuser, dim lights, and birth comb. I later learned from Pam that the hospital staff was so respectful of all my wishes on my birth plan. They even spoke in a whisper tone and ensured the environment was a peaceful one. The nurses were also very respectful about my desire for fewer cervical checks. I think I was only checked about 3 times in total, all of them with my consent. 

While in active labor in my hospital room, I utilized my bouncing ball, birthing comb, swaying while holding onto my husband, and various positions on the bed. I wore my own labor gown throughout labor and delivery. It’s just one of the little things that made me feel more like a woman and less like a hospital patient. At one point, contractions were so powerful that I had a moment of fear creep into my heart. I thought, “Can I really do this to the end? Maybe I need the epidural.” But I remember reading and hearing from others that when you reach this moment, the end is near! So I powered through it and kept going. I think the dilating from 9cm to 10cm was one of the hardest parts of my labor. My body felt the urge to push, but I was told I could not push yet. Some may say this is a natural urge and we should just go with it regardless of their protocol. Maybe they are right, but I trusted their advice. Pam helped me to breathe through the painful urge to push. Eventually, the nurses came in and confirmed that I was 10cm and ready to push. At around 6:30pm, I began to push. Thankfully, the nurses were so accommodating and let me push on my hands and knees Honestly, this was the most relieving part of the entire process! Physically, pushing felt natural. And mentally, I could see how close I was to the end!

I’m very thankful that the doctor was so patient with me while I took my time pushing. She didn’t seem bothered or impatient at all. But I think the doctor could sense that I was afraid of the dreaded “ring of fire.” She doctor encouraged me to push through it. With each contraction, they counted out loud to 10 and had me push for the duration of their counting. I felt my baby’s head come down to the opening with each contraction. But as soon as it was over, his head went back up. After this happened a couple of times, I felt so discouraged. At one point, I remember saying, “His head keeps going back in! He’s not coming out! I can’t do this!” But Pam, my husband, and the nurses were so encouraging. I would later learn that this was actually part of God’s beautiful design, allowing for the gentle stretching of the perineum rather than an abrupt tear. The final push that brought my son into the world was a total blur. I vaguely remember hearing “Your baby is here!” or something like that. But maybe I was still processing what just happened. They put him on my chest, and I just cried. It was so surreal. At the same time, I felt so strong and powerful after that. Like, wow, I really just did that?! Yes, I can’t lie to anyone…it was painful. It was hard. But it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. And it was also so, so rewarding. I would definitely do it again. 

Pregnancy and birth taught me a lot about myself. Throughout the ups and downs of pregnancy, I learned how crucial it is to invite God into every part and to trust his good plans through the unexpected turns. God is good and has good intentions, even if things don’t go the way we want. Even if my placenta previa did not resolve and I did have to have a C-section, I would still praise and thank God for his love and sovereignty in all things. As I learned about birth and went through it myself, I was continually amazed at just how perfectly our bodies were designed for birth.     

If I could do things over again, I would mostly do everything the same. I feel really good about how my labor and delivery went. But there are a couple things I would do differently. One practical thing during delivery, I think it would have been helpful and encouraging to reach down and feel my baby’s head at the opening while pushing. I think feeling his head (maybe even his soft baby hair) would have encouraged me in that moment of fear. Also, I regret not taking any videos during the labor and delivery. I know birth is very intimate, but I really enjoy looking at the pictures that I do have (thank you, Pam!), and I wish I had some videos too.  

One final note. I felt like the timing of my labor and delivery was truly divine. The week before I gave birth, our church studied Exodus 15, Moses’ song after the Israelites crossed through the Red Sea. Moses sang, “The LORD is my strength and my song; he has become my salvation. He is my God, and I will praise him, my father’s God, and I will exalt him.” I kept repeating that verse to myself throughout labor, and it served as an anchor for me. Indeed, God was my strength and song throughout my labor and delivery, and I praise him for being with me through it all. I definitely recommend having some kind of key verse to hold onto throughout labor and delivery so that God can truly be the center of the entire process.